Growth doesn't come easy. At our hardest moments we find the greatest aptitude for change, for understanding, and empathy for others. The last few months have shown me that there is no guarantees of anything. I think intellectually we all know this. We make plans for trips, and jobs, and big moves all based on the word someday. Someday I will go there. One day I will do that. Sure, we may need to plan these things to some extent but wouldn't it be great to just not plan every last bit of your life? To not over obsess over every detail?
Over the next few months I am going to challenge myself to start doing instead of planning to do. I actually started a month ago. I left my job of three years with no plan of what I would do next. After my marriage ended I felt lost. In some ways I still fight that feeling of failure, of loneliness without my partner. I couldn't decide if my job led to my failed marriage or the other way around. I loved what I did, helping students find their path, but felt that I needed to find my own. I needed to reboot my life entirely.
Growth definitely does not come easy.
I am now looking for a new job, one that fuels my need to connect with others and to give back to the world in a way that feels intrinsic and real. I am eager to find a role where I feel that I am making an impact. Now the challenge is finding it.
Part of this discovery process was to revamp my website. In doing so some areas are now under construction but if you are patient you will see some great things happening over the next few days.
What began all of this need to rediscover myself?
I listened to a TED Talk by Emilie Wapnick called "Why some of us don't have one true calling". It really struck home. I never had that one type of career that I strove to accomplish. I wanted to be a teacher once, then a marine biologist, on to a CSI. I sometimes feel lost and jealous of those who have that "one thing" they always knew they wanted to be.
Watch the video below if you want to see if this concept applies to you. It is about 12 minutes in length.
Now I sit here, a long time planner, with a lack of plan at all. Say a little prayer for me that I find what I am looking for and that it is a fulfilling as I know it can be. Emilie Wapnick says, "Follow your curiosity down those rabbit holes". If I have any plan at all, it is to do just that.
All My Best,