Embracing Change

I know that it has been a long time since I posted anything. Normally I would have posted a recap of my last year and set some goals for the next. However, this year things are very different in my personal life and a blog post such as that did not seem to be fitting. So, I waited until I had something of substance to share with you. Today is finally that day.

Things began to change significantly for me after a friend invited me last September to visit him in Chicago. We hadn't known each other long so initially I just shrugged at the offer. I just thought he was being nice. I am ashamed to admit that I really didn't take the offer seriously. As Thanksgiving approached though I started to think about it more and more. I reached out to him to see if he was truly serious about me coming to visit him. He was and we talked about dates that might work. That evening I looked at flights and finding one that worked I booked a flight the next morning after sleeping on it just to be sure. Here I was, now looking forward to a trip to a city I had never been to and with a man that I only knew for a short time at that point. I can tell you that booking that trip would have never happened had I not had this gut instinct that it was exactly what I needed to do and if I didn't trust him. It is not really in my nature to take risks like that and those that know me well know this to be true. Still, I made sure that when the trip rolled around people knew where I was. I wasn't worried though. Not at all.

In early December I headed to the windy city in what would be one of the most life changing trips I have taken on my own. For the first time in a long time I embraced that my life was going to change in dramatic fashion in 2016. In spite all of the things that happened this summer and how I was able to find the strength to get through them, I did not actually start feeling that I was on the right path until after that trip. It was not just all of the fun things we did which did include some awesome moments and meeting some great people. It was more that I had truly enjoyed them. I credit my friend for helping with that too. He was great at just letting me decide what I wanted out of that trip and that was what mattered. I laughed more than I had in a long time. It was liberating to have an entire weekend where I didn't worry or stress about what was going on in my life. Instead, I was just living it.

I cannot tell you in words how awesome that feeling was. I just a few short days I fell for a city that I never would have imagined living in before. There is a certain something about it that just grabbed me and took hold. My friend said “You could always move here.” At first I just smiled at that thought but after coming back to Vegas that comment nagged at me. I had a few weeks at that point to decide if I was going to renew my lease or look for something else. That was when I started thinking that maybe moving to Chicago would actually be a good thing for me.

It was not a decision I made lightly at all. I started looking into it and exploring the pros and cons of that decision. Since my lease was up in March I either had to renew at a higher rate for the few months I needed to finish my responsibilities to Komen, or panic and find other options. Panic I did. My friend here stepped in and is letting myself and Castle stay with her until I can finalize my move to Chicago which will happen mid-May. I had a few panic moments that I was making the wrong decision. Was one wonderful weekend enough to completely uproot my life? Was the one friend and two family members that live there enough of an anchor to help me start over? The answer to those questions are ones I won’t have until I actually take that leap of faith but now that I am committed to it there is no looking back.

For the first time in my life I am deciding to take a risk and will be embracing all of the changes that are waiting for me. In a few weeks I will head back to Chicago to look for an apartment and to set some roots there. With some hard work, a few prayers, and a bit of luck over the next year I will be sharing with you all of the fantastic things that have come to my life all because I was brave enough to welcome them in.


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